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Decadent Decade

by Brandon Jordan

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1.
Brick by brick, It's all falling down, The newspapers scream, And the television lies, That nothing’s all right Everybody’s gonna die, Everything’s in Lo-Fi, I hear some people in the other room They’re screaming, talking about all the things, That they should of done better, And I can’t help feel doomed You don’t want a revolution, You just want your institution, I’m tired of hearing your lies, And being told nothing’s alright I don’t want to be traumatized by the war on TV, The bricks falling at home, And the lies being told to me Nothing about your future, is quite so convincing to me, But hey that's just me Brick by brick, It's all falling down, The newspapers scream, And the television lies, That nothing’s all right Everybody’s gonna die, Everything’s in Lo-Fi, I hear some people in the other room They’re screaming, talking about all the things, That they should of done better, And I can’t help feel doomed
2.
Heaven is a dream, That just seems, Like it was made, For you and me Part of the machine, Part of the big dream, We feel that we are numbers, On a screen The machine is awake, I ruined their myth of me, I'm not what they wanted, I am someone else Everybody's sleeping, They got their head in the clouds, They got the T-shirt on, They got the television loud And everything is just damn fine Nothing’s on their minds As long as I know, There is a world outside dreams, I don’t even notice, What it’s like to be free anymore, At least I know unlike them I am not like them And God only knows, Where they’d be without you, It just goes to show, Where they’d be without you Heaven is a dream, That was made, For you and me It just seems, Like it was made, For you and me
3.
Mushy Gushy 04:29
I never get tired of looking at you Sometimes the myth of you But not the real you You want back childhood Yours was no good Left alone, left alone To things that would kill you I wanna keep you From grinding your teeth, "You have your own keys" I'll just keep repeating I smell you in my scarf And in the bedroom Sometimes I wish that I could go back Go back and fix this I wanna get mushy-gushy Just a classic romance Cause you put me into a trance You make me so fuzzy Mushy-gushy, little honey, little honey Mushy gushy, mushy gushy Heartbreaker Sex maker Dusty lusty I’m so rusty You’re so lovely Oh if you're lonely Let's get mushy-gushy Let's get mushy-gushy I wanna get mushy-gushy I want a classic romance You make me so fuzzy Little honey Mushy-gushy, mushy-gushy I wanna get you, mushy-gushy Mushy-gushy, mushy-gushy I wanna get, mushy-gushy Mushy-gushy, oh I love you Oh I love you, mushy-gushy
4.
Ghost Pain 04:00
At home in stasis, The same positions, The same philosophy, I don’t know myself, But I feel I know inertia Same ghost pains, The same stuff in the same veins, Phantom remains of memories, When I got hurt long ago, But just forgot Always gettin’ put in my place, I need some bad day medicine, This house has monsters in it already, At least by comparison I'm sorry, I don't mean to hurt your feelings, I just feel like I'm dying, Like I'm growing older, But I'm none the wiser I’m scared I might have schizophrenia, Or just some kind of paranoia, Secretly contemplating suicide, Right after I had internal diatribe I hate myself so much, I hate hating myself, It's not even worth it, Even if you tell me, That I don't deserve it I just can't believe you, Sometimes it feels like me, And sometimes it feels like you’re just not convinced Ghost pain, Haunted trauma, Do they have unfinished business, And how much longer? Defense mechanisms, Tense perfectionism, Does trauma ever go away, Or does it just always stay and haunt you? Always stay and haunt you Does it just always stay and haunt you? I’m so tired of being too young, But getting old scares me, I feel like I've lived too long for things to ever change, They’ll just get worse Nothing to say, Nothing to do, Where’s my new coat of paint, Where’s my room electric blue These ideas, they can’t be real, But they find me, they’re inside me, Who am I to say they’re mine, Do they really describe me Ghost pain, Haunted trauma, Do they have unfinished business, And how much longer? Defense mechanisms, Tense perfectionism, Does trauma ever go away, Or does it just always stay and haunt you? Does it just always stay and haunt you? Does it just always stay and haunt you?
5.
Little Mouse 01:59
Little mouse, You just looked like you were sleeping, I brought you flowers on your birthday You were warm and now you’re so cold, I needed you to stay And I miss you so, And I needed you to stay, Where did you go, Will I believe in this today Little mouse, we gave you everything we’ve got Little mouse, You can come to our wedding, You will look so beautiful, I wanted her to meet you, And now you’re gone, so long
6.
Baby Teeth 08:18
Baby teeth, You got hit, And fell out of my mouth, It was blood that poured you out I was there, and no one cared Baby teeth, You are bleeding underneath, Will I ever learn to brush for good, But you hung in there, At least you cared, about me having a good smile Baby teeth, You hid, Underneath my bed, Scared of being out of my mouth, Only God must know how that feels Baby Teeth, You’ve got a big T, These new teeth always want me to be in pain, But you had a lot of sympathy, For a growing boy Baby teeth, I miss you quite a lot, Every day you’re not in my mouth, Oh, I am wanting to go back, I am sick of cleaning plaque Baby teeth, You taught me to say goodbye, My body isn’t forever, This new set will go the same, I am more than just my teeth Baby teeth, I just wanted to say, I just realized today, Thank you for giving me a second chance, I don’t get much of those today Baby teeth, And though you didn't even make it, To my first kiss, or when I got hit by a car, You always did try your best, And I don’t have many people like that anymore Baby teeth, I just feel like I can’t do this, People have come and people have gone, And so will I and so will these new teeth, Just like you Baby teeth, How can I live, If can barely take care of my teeth, Oh, what would you, think of me, Would you leave me all over again I never wanted you to be in shame, For what we did that summer, Was I the reason you were changing, Is that really so hard to say? Baby teeth, I just wanted to say, I just realized today, Thank you for giving me a second chance, I don’t get much of those today

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released March 6, 2020

Everything by Brandon Jordan

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Brandon Jordan Fort Wayne, Indiana

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